As I am wont to do, it is time for a change. As I move gayly forward into 2017, I felt it was time to do away with the old and focus on the new. Yes, that means a number of my old posts are gone.
The past couple of years, in particular, were hard on me. I moved into this year with high hopes only to see them dashed with pain, fatigue and flares too numerous to mention. Fortunately, those flares did not land me in a hospital but, in terms of my overall mental health, they took me down a few notches.
Too, the medication I’ve been on has not helped my poor brain. Brain fog, dropped digits, no synapse, name it, I experienced it. Prednisone is notorious for interfering with sleep. Lack of sleep doesn’t help the brain function. Finally, when my brain isn’t functioning well my writing makes no sense. Sad, but true. I’ve looked back at some of my old posts with embarrassment wondering what heck was I trying to say.
Lupus is not for wimps.
Well, no chronic illness is for the faint of heart. Having been accustomed to some normalcy in my life, admittedly, this has been one humbling experience.
Midyear, I decided to go “balls to the wall” as a friend of mine likes saying. Though I have no such appendages, I did go there. I put myself on an exercise program knowing it would cause me great, or greater pain. It’s a long story but, to make it short, I was finally diagnosed with Lupus when my immune system attacked my kidneys. This is called Lupus Nephritis. It also means my kidneys spill the very proteins needed for building muscle. It’s a vicious cycle but the hard work is paying off.
Like an old song, I’m starting all over again and it is rough. Thankfully, I’ve lost a lot of weight and looking to lose more. My endurance is building and that’s a good thing. Finally, and perhaps more importantly, my heart is getting stronger. My first attempt at doing cardio was dangerous. I elevated my heart rate to an extremely dangerous level and could have died. I once heard “God takes care of fools and babies,” well, considering I’m no baby I will admit to being a fool, particularly on that day. Maybe I’ll talk about that later.
Moving on. Don’t be alarmed, things are changing here and hopefully, I’ll be a bit more diligent in keeping up with both this site and another I’ve left sitting in the dust for a while. My other site, FemmeNoir, has been left abandoned for a while as i have been trying to decide what to do with it: to take it back to what it was or go forward doing something else. I’m not so sure I’m the same person now as I was then for a number of reasons. However, I have been delighted to find some pretty nasty comments left there ordering, if not urging, my return to the site. Strangely, people are still linking to it. Who knows and like everything else in my life, it remains to be seen what I’ll do with it.
And with that, I’ll be hanging around here making changes. Don’t know how it will end up and I’ll probably have to play with some coding — something I’ve stayed away from while doing large doses of Prednisone. I will probably get a little creative, again something I’ve stayed away from with that ruckem, suckem drug. Now that I have a little more giddy-up I can’t wait to explore some of the new tools out there. Oh my God I can’t wait.
Check in often and . . .
Happy New Year!
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